Why do we sometimes see ghosts? (5)

One afternoon, I was home alone and as I stood in the family room, I had felt this sudden sadness, like a cloak of sorrow blanketed over not just myself, but it filled up the entire void in the room. And a thick fear. However, this overwhelming sadness and fear did not emanate through me. How could it? I was comfortably inside my own home, what is there to be afraid of? Nothing.
Those people who have experienced a ghost of some kind, all have said the same thing: I felt this presence. I wasn't the only one in the room. Something or someone was watching me. And I have to admit, it's true. I had the feeling someone was watching me. In movies and shows they make a big deal over it because they want to attract their viewers. Since I'm being honest, I love those shows too, but I could also tell when something is extremely bogus, which is most of the time. Like all ghosts want to deliberately terrify us night and day because they have nothing else better to do.  Maybe so, but that's not always the case.

This soul was only passing by. The earth seemed to stop spinning in the span of those seconds and my eyes naturally gravitated toward the back windows. That's when I saw an outline of a clear figure of a man. Not old at all, since souls are never old. He stopped a moment, turned and met my eyes. I sensed he was simply passing by from this world into the next. As much as I would've liked to have felt peace at that moment, however, it did not come. I could not find it and peace did not find me. I also sensed he was  shocked that I was looking straight at him. I also sensed that he was so fatigued. He just slumped by like a tired soldier. 

Once he slipped from my view at the last window, the fear and deep sorrow followed him like a plague. I realize now that the fear this soul carried was not to purposefully frighten me, this fear was every sin he harbored on earth was hanging onto him into the next world.
Heaven.
Will our souls carry on the same way?
What about those people who die so suddenly? No warning whatsoever.
We should pray for them. For mercy. There is only One who gives mercy.
Maybe they make themselves known to people because they are asking for you to pray for them. Maybe they hinder their souls from continuing because they deeply fear what they do not know. Fearing the worst. Maybe as people on earth they never knew that there is a someone that loves them since before they were even born? Could it be that they have chosen not to love and follow Him?

How can we service our lives for others while on earth? There's that old adage, 'live as if today was your last.' I am sure that is easier said than done, but I will tell you what one of my favorites quotes by Princess Diana,

"Carry out a random act of kindness, with no expectation of reward, safe in the knowledge that one day someone might do the same for you."

This doesn't necessarily mean to solve world hunger in one day or to stop every war in one day, (that would be amazing), but it's the simple things you do for others that make a huge difference. More than one can realize. Even just a simple smile.

So, why did I see this soul, this ghost pass by? Maybe he believed he could do it on his own. Carry the weight of his doubts, worries, fears and sorrow while on earth. He was wrapped up in his own worldly fear that he could not find the strength to find the light.

Also, I believe it is a reminder to everyone that our real home is in God's Kingdom and we are all tired, sorrowful, fearful souls trudging along for a very short time. We cannot make it on our own without His guidance and us allowing Him to guide us.  Maybe this soul needed more prayer because he feared that there might not have been a God? Maybe he believed God is a mean God and not a merciful one? If we all collectively prayed for others, living and dead, then God will hear and will answer. If we were all loving and kind to others, even to those that wrong us, then we have found the light and through us so have they.

Finding faith on a Saturday morning (4)

There are some things in this world that are not meant to be understood. It is only human nature for us to want to rationalize everything. Some things are meant for us to simply ponder about. And other things are kept to only have room for faith.
I remember sitting in the living room one brightly lit Saturday morning with my grandmother, (she had to have been on her third cup of coffee by the time I woke up) and I sipped on English breakfast tea. Her ritual every morning was in prayer. As we sipped away and she talked and I listened in a spiritual sense, I always felt that peace. And that peace manifested into something more.

My eyes locked onto an empty space of the wall across the living room. Suddenly, it was like somebody was slowly lifting a shade and behind that shade was the light of the sun and as this beacon of light shone, I saw two women figures that seemed to be in motion. I saw the swish of their long dresses and they were carrying each a huge jar of some sort on their shoulders. I could tell these women were working. These two women might've been carrying jugs of water for their families or holding food or clothing. That I am not quite sure about. In my heart, I knew these women were going about their daily tasks, their daily morning rituals. It was truly amazing to witness, even as I think back on it now. I was able to take a glimpse of history. The past that was brought right before my eyes. Or is it not the past? Could what we perceive as history be happening now as I write? Just a thought.

In the moment of gazing at these women, I felt in my heart, again, that they were trying to tell me something more. They have a story and their story is unfolding right before my eyes. These women were not only physically fit, but they were happy, spiritually strong with kind hearts, despite the seemingly mundane repetition of working day in and day out to care for their families.
I pointed at the image to show my grandmother and said,
"Dontcha see that!" More as an expression rather than a question, but very quickly after I had said that the image of the women had vanished. And then it was back to being a plain wall. My grandmother did not see what I had seen. Something not of this world, but had once left its footprints. Seeing the image had given me peace.
I cannot understand why I saw such an image or an image at all for that matter?

For weeks afterwards I pondered and even years later to this day, I do not know why I experienced such a beautiful and peaceful moment, a simple moment of the past. I realize now that sometimes we are allowed to witness what the human mind cannot decipher, but your heart tells you to have faith.

Labels (3)

I dreaded walking home from school everyday. If I could've turned myself inside out or even better, become invisible, I could've danced my way home happily. Little shy me. Little, feeble-minded, shy me. Labels that were thrown at me from every direction. Ignorant. That's my favorite. It's like I had my brain out in a display case and they pinpricked my flaws my weakness. That stuff that was inevitably a part of me, but it certainly did not make me who I was as a person. A human being dressed in more than just flesh and bone, but one should and one heart. Labels that delve deeper thank skin, these were labels that were hidden, or at least, I believed to be hidden. I wanted them to be hidden. Unfortunately, they were discovered. Obvious to the outside world. I felt that my character was being attacked. The part of me I have grown to detest. The labels I have grown to believe in.

And that's when I saw them, the small ones dancing in threes. Just an outline of tiny bodies. Going around in a continuous circle, smiling and joyously laughing and dancing as I arrived home. I just stood there in the driveway, curiously watching. It delighted my heart to see such beauty, but such an unexplainable, typically unseen event, brought upon the naked eye. My naked eye. And I knew there is nothing to be feared. What happens in the past, stays in the past.